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How to tell family and friends you've lost your job

Other

Use it when

You're finding it hard to start the conversation, or want to ask for help without feeling like a burden.

Fill in the [brackets]

SHORT VERSION (text or message) "Hey [name], I wanted you to hear this from me. My job at [Company] was made redundant. I'm okay and I'm working on a plan. I might need a bit of support, even just someone to talk to. Can I give you a call [tonight/this weekend]?" FOR A PARTNER "I need to talk to you about something important. My role has been made redundant. I'm scared and I don't want to hide it. Here's what I know: [last day, pay, notice]. Here's what I'm doing next: [applying for Jobseeker Support, talking to the bank, updating my CV]. Can we sit down together and go through our budget? I don't want to face this alone." FOR PARENTS / WHĀNAU "Mum/Dad, I want to let you know that I've lost my job in a restructure. It's nothing I did wrong. I'm applying for work and for support. I'm not asking for money, but I'd love to know I can ring you if I need a chat." IF YOU DO NEED HELP "Something that would really help me right now is [a meal once a week / someone to look over my CV / lending me the car for interviews / a loan of $X which I will repay by [date]]." WHEN YOU DON'T WANT ADVICE "I'm not looking for advice right now, I just need someone to listen."

Tips

  • Redundancy is about the role, not you. Say it plainly and early; keeping it secret increases stress.
  • Pick a calm moment. Choose one person first, then let them help you tell others.
  • Be specific about help. People want to help but often don't know how.
  • If money is shared, have a joint budget conversation early. MoneyTalks (0800 345 123) can help.
  • If you feel overwhelmed, call or text 1737 any time, or Lifeline 0800 543 354.

General information, not legal advice. Keep a copy of everything you send. Spotted something out of date? Email help@unemployed.nz.